Top 8 things to avoid doing in a relationship

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By: Mahrukh Sanai

Relationships are hard and you need to put a lot of effort into them. Despite being in a relationship for many years, I still need to learn things from time to time about the connection. So, follow these tips if you want to keep that spark alive in your relationship!

1. Don't stop putting in the effort

This happens when you get too comfortable with someone. You stop putting in the effort to celebrate birthdays and anniversaries. You stop complimenting the other person and giving them time and importance in your life. You treat them like an afterthought and do not remember them when at work or with friends. This can make your partner feel alone and not loved.

2. Don't put down other person

Have you seen the House Hunters, or Love it, or any other shows featuring married couples? These shows present couples that are unkind to each other, but you will miss it if you do not pay attention to it. The couples take the nastiest taunt at the other person, but all of it is treated as a harmless joke. It is an ugly thing to take shots at each other, whether in private or in front of other people. You should not do these in a relationship.

3. Never lose a sense of who you are

People lose their sense of self in a relationship. They pick up the hobbies and interests of the other person. They pick up the personality traits of their better half but lose themselves. It is great to share the hobbies and interests of your spouse and learn from each other. But you must never lose your sense of self in a relationship. Always celebrate your independence whether you are single or committed. Your true self is who your partner fell in love with...

4. DO NOT CHEAT in a relationship

This is really a no brainer. DO. NOT. CHEAT. You must respect your spouse. Cheating on your spouse is not acceptable and destroys the relationship in the long run. You lose trust, confidence, love...

5. Don't compare your spouse

Even if you have been in relationships before, or have been with many people in a previous life, you should not compare your spouse with other people. No one likes if their better half compares them with a hot girl at the party or muscular guy at the gym.

6. Don't deal with problems last minute

If your spouse voices his concerns or opinions, you need to hear them. It is better to hear the issue from their point of view and treat it beforehand. Don’t wait until the whole issue becomes even more complicated and unresolvable. If there is any issue, communication is key.

7. Don't put everyone else before them

When you are in a relationship with someone, you need to feel important as well. It is not nice to say you are important but when you have good news, you call your friend. When you want to explore a new place, you arrange a group together with your pals but do not ask your spouse. You share your meals and new restaurants with Facebook friends. It is equally important to be treated as the most significant person in his/her life and not treated with words only.

8. Never stop supporting your Spouse

No matter what happens you should always have your partner’s back. No matter if they make a bad decision, you must pick them up and support them. You must not mock your partner for his short giving and failings in life. It is time to be their support system and backbone in life. You need to accept your partner for who they are and do not try to change them into something you believe is better. You should not try to mold your partner into the ideal being as it does not exist in reality.